


Emmett Perkins and the End Of the World

by Newt_salamander



Category: The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: Emmett has a good relationship with his co-workers, Genderbending, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Mutual Pining, This is Bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-28
Updated: 2020-03-28
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:40:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23365573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Newt_salamander/pseuds/Newt_salamander
Summary: Emmett Perkins shouldn't be stuck here. He should be arguing about something trivial with Zoey or venting to Hidgens. He should not be stuck at the end of the world with the cute guy he'd been crushing on.----Basically an AU where Emma's a dude (based on Nick Lang's show stopping performance)
Relationships: Paul Matthews/Emma Perkins, Paul Matthews/Emmett Perkins
Comments: 7
Kudos: 39





	Emmett Perkins and the End Of the World

Emmett Perkins wasn’t special. He wasn’t the ‘chosen one’ or a superhero. Yet, it seemed that he was the last man in Hatchetfield (and maybe Clivesdale as well) for no apparent reason other than he didn’t quit his job a day earlier. As he tried to crawl his way out of the Hive’s grasp, he had a few regrets.

It was a cold winter morning and Starbucks was closed. Unfortunately, that meant Emmett’s day was about to get a hell of a lot worse. As a barista at the off-brand Starbucks down the street, he had to serve all of the usual Starbucks customers as his own. It meant twice the stress, twice the half-assed flirting, and twice the whiny customers. Honestly, between this and community college classes (Other than Hidgens’, obviously) he wouldn’t be surprised if he just dropped dead one day. 

After making what felt like hundreds of complicated coffee orders, Emmett leaned against the counter, hoping Nora wouldn’t catch him. He sighed as the bell rang another time- “Hi welcome to Beanie’s! We’ll fulfill your needs, as long as they’re beans! How can I help you?” He said in his best customer service voice, rattling off the painfully bad slogan. He looked up to see a tall man in a suit smiling awkwardly, shifting his weight. 

“One black coffee, please. Medium.” He ordered.

Emmett froze.

_ He was cute. _

Don’t get him wrong, there were plenty of guys and gals who caught his eye (you see quite a lot of people in Beanie’s for it being in a small town.) Yet, he didn’t think he’d seen this man around before. Sandy hair, blue eyes, and an overwhelming sense of unease. He was really adorable. Emmett might have been examining the guy for too long, because he cleared his throat and drummed his fingers on the counter, clearly not knowing what to do next. 

“Sure, that’ll be $2.70”

The man looked up from where he was staring.

“Oh, that’s not  _ too  _ bad, I guess” He remarked —mostly to himself— before taking the coffee Emmett had given him and taking his leave. 

That was the beginning of the end for Emmett.

  
  
  


The next two weeks, the man (Paul, he’d found out from Zoey) had come at random hours of the day to order a medium black coffee and make very bad small talk with Emmett. It seemed that Paul always happened to turn up when he knew for sure Emmett had a shift. Taking this into account, Emmett was trying his absolute best not to interact with him. He just felt like a guy who tried this hard to see him couldn’t be good. It became so bad, Zoey started questioning his sanity.

“Em, you realize that every time Business Boy walks in here, you practically scramble to go to the restroom or work in the back. If you keep doing stuff like that, he might actually think you’re not interested.” She stoically joked. Emmett groaned. 

“I just think it’s kinda weird that he’s always, like  _ here.  _ He always comes in when I’m working and it’s honestly... kinda creepy.”

“You don’t think he just likes the coffee?”

“Zoey, I  _ know  _ he doesn’t just like the coffee.”

“Well, then maybe he has a crush! Isn’t that cute?” Zoey nudged him. 

Emmett had quite a few things to say about that suggestion in particular, but was interrupted by the bell ringing and — _ speak of the devil _ — Paul entered, this time with a woman by his side. They seemed close, friendly almost. That’s when Emmett realized maybe he’s so relationship-starved that he thought that Paul liked him. Of  _ course _ he’s straight. He’s a tall, skinny white guy who looks like he just learned how to use his limbs— girls should love him! He walked up to the counter and smiled. 

“Hey. I’m just gonna get a-“

“Medium black coffee, yeah.”

Paul’s eyes widened. 

“Uh, yeah. I’m also gonna order a caramel frappe and a vanilla latte.”

Shit. Emmett wasn’t supposed to be the creepy one.  _ There’s no way after two weeks that someone wouldn’t have memorized an order _ , he tried to justify to himself. Yet, it would be even weirder if Emmett tried to justify himself to the man. Paul seemed to forget about it fast enough, paying and going back to talking to the woman next to him before heading out. Zoey looked like she was about to have a stroke.

“Holy fuck, man. That was way too painful to watch. Just ask him out.”

“He has a girlfriend! Did you see that lady he walked in with? The one with the glasses? They’re together, I can feel it.”

“You can….  _ Feel it _ ? Emmett, when was the last time you used common sense to dictate how you think.”

“Trick question. Never.” 

Zoey sighed, obviously tired with Emmett’s bullshit, before clocking out for the day.

  
  
  


It didn’t stop. It had been a month and a half since Paul came in that first day and nothing had changed. He’d get his coffee at ungodly hours of the day, say something small, trip over someone, and leave. Zoey didn’t let up either. She’d even started taunting him with love songs, most of them Broadway. Some didn’t even make sense in context. Today, after finishing “Agony”, she starts on “Point of No Return”. 

“Zoey.” Emmett groaned through gritted teeth. 

“Please get over it. He’s never said more than ‘Thank you’ or ‘How’s the weather’ to me. He’s just a regular who I got off on the wrong foot with.” Zoey nodded, glaring at him. 

“Yeah, Em. Just a regular who you stare at every time they walk in, walk out and order. Just a regular who’s schedule you have down so you can make their coffee before they get here.”

“It’s called good work ethic. Look it up.” 

  
  
  


Another positive of Zoey being younger than him is that she never went to high school with him. Nora, unfortunately did. They don’t talk about it much (She’s a couple of years younger than him), but it was brought up from time to time. 

Usually for blackmail. 

“Oh my god! Do you just see that guy that just walked in?” Nora all but squealed.

Seeing as Paul just strolled in with no one at his side, that made Emmett a tad bit worried. 

“…Yeah. Why?”

“I’m like one hundred percent sure that’s the freshman from Sycamore that got caught making out with one of your cast members when y’all did Brigadoon.”

He had a faint memory of that rumor going around, plus Fredi Leigh told him that she’d seen it firsthand.

There’s no way  _ that  _ was Paul. 

You think that man-“ He points at Paul, now apologizing to shelved coffee beans for bumping into them “-made out with Elijah Clayton in a bathroom stall? No fucking way, dude.” Nora rolled her eyes. 

“Whatever, you’re no fun.” She paused before regaining her usual ‘I’m your boss, shut the fuck up’ demeanor. 

“ Get back to work, shithead.”

“Not if you don’t first, dumbass”

  
  
  


It’s been three months. This was getting  _ really bad.  _ Emmett now had what he admitted was a crush (Not that’d he tell Zoey) and he had done nothing to act on it. It was becoming a freakish routine. Paul and company would walk in, order leave. Emmett would just stare at him and his smile the whole time. Plus, Paul hadn’t just ruined Emmett’s work hours by making him mess up orders and stumble over words. He had also ruined his (already shitty) sleep schedule. Emmett would try to sleep and see his stupid blue eyes and his stupid soft hair (That he’d never touched). It was so awful that people were starting to notice. 

Zoey: “Em, did you finally give in and start doing heroin without telling me?”

Nora: “Get your shit together, Emmett. I’ve threatened to fire you three times in a fortnight and you’ve barely batted an eye.”

Hidgens: “Good god, Emmett. I know you’re not the best at Evolutionary Biology, but you need to keep up. You’re going to fail this class if I don’t stop (probably illegally) sticking out for you.”

Even Paul had noticed. After paying for a black coffee and a chai iced tea, he turned to leave before changing his mind and coming back. 

“Hey, are you ok? Not that it’s my place to ask, but you seem really slow lately. I haven’t seen you curse at any of the customers who were acting out of line in three days.” He chuckled at his own joke. “You don’t have to tell me though, it was really rude to just ask about your health without knowing about your past and your life and your routine, just forget I asked so it doesn’t have to be awkward between us and so you can keep talking to me— not that I need you to talk to me or whatever but-“

“Hey.”

Paul took a breath. 

“Yeah?”

“I’m fine. Thanks for asking. Don’t worry about anything else. I’m just here to serve your coffee and look pretty.”

Emmett playfully punched his arm from over the counter as Paul turned bright red. 

“Sorry about that. Have a nice day, man.” He waved before finally leaving the shop.

Zoey looked like she wanted to kill Emmett with her mind.

“I’m about to scream. I want to just-” She made a strangling motion with her hands at him, “-Lock you two in a cupboard and throw away the key. You have no idea how painful this is for me, bro. You really haven’t dated in a bit, have you?”

Emmett grunted.

”No.” 

  
  
  


It had been 7 months. Emmett had started to treat the crush like just a pain he would have to live with. He had more important things to worry about, considering Nora decided  _ singing  _ would be a great way to spice up their café. Today was ten times worse since this jerkass decided to make a big deal out of tipping Emmett. It was so bad, Nora threatened his job again. Luckily, Paul was in line after him. Emmett almost kissed him (He wouldn’t though, Paul’s straight. Probably.) from relief. Paul ordered, smiling. “I’ve got an easy one for you. Just a cup of black coffee.”  _ Jeez, so chaste. _ He was acting like Emmett hadn’t been staring at him like a horny teenager for months on end. Then Paul tipped him, and Emmett was ready to take practically a year of crushing back.  _ What an asshole _ . 

“Jesus! Really?  _ I’ve been brewing up your coffee. _ ”

“No! No, no, no. Uh, I’m sorry. I don’t need you to sing.” 

_ Oh thank god.  _ Emmett smiled while enjoying the small talk they engaged in. He decided to go in and shoot his shot. What’s the worst that could happen? If Paul was one of those homophobic douches that hated when guys hit on them, he’d probably never see him again, which was good for his well being and conscience. 

“I see you in here all the time, don’t I? What’s your name?” 

Of course, Emmett already knew Paul’s name. Before this all started, Zoey flirted a little bit with Paul to know what his name was (since Emmett was too cowardly to ask). It wouldn’t hurt to act like he didn’t, though. It would make his Creep Meter go down a bit. 

“Paul.”

“HI Paul, I’m Emmett.”

The silence wasn’t awkward. It felt comfortable and safe. Emmett just grinned. 

  
  


Zoey had been acting weird all morning. Emmett knew that this whole singing thing was rules now, but did Zoey have to follow it so tentatively? She’d sang everything to Emmett today. It was insufferable. She didn’t look like the Zoey he knew. Emmett felt…  _ wrong. _ Something was amiss. He might not be friends with his two co-workers, but he did have the right to be worried about them. Paul walking in looking like he’d just seen a ghost confirmed his worst fears.

“Hello!  _ Hello?”  _

Emmett can pinpoint that as the moment his day went from bad to awful.

  
  


**_Get your cup of poisoned coffee!_ ** Was all Emmett could hear as he ran out of the coffeehouse hand in hand with Paul. A scream was stuck in his throat and his breathing wasn’t right. He tried the exercises Hidgens taught him, but it didn’t work. 

The world didn’t stop for him. 

The Apotheosis kept coming, and Emmett couldn’t stop to regain his thoughts.

“Ugh. Why did I come back here?” Emmett sighed to himself, feeling close to crying. This wasn’t supposed to end like this. 

Paul, bless his heart, didn’t understand. Emmett found himself telling Paul his stupid life story and seeing his face fill with pity. This is not what Emmett wanted. He wanted to be the cool, semi-hot (He’s not gonna flatter himself), mysterious barista that Paul was begging to score a date with. Now he’s a fuck up with a dead sister and no friends. 

“Hey, we’re the same age, how come I never knew you in high school?”

“You probably went to Hatchetfield High, I went to Sycamore.”

“Fucking Timberwolves! We hated you guys!”

“We hated ourselves!” 

Emmett paused. He  _ was  _ the guy Nora was talking about. That meant chances of Paul being straight just went down a hell of a lot faster that Emmett’s current psyche was comfortable with.

“That was 2003, right? I actually saw Brigadoon! It was the first musical I ever saw. I hated it. That’s probably what started my whole thing. You’re the reason I don’t like musicals!”

“Wow. That’s like… your origin story. So I guess that makes me the super villain, huh?”

Paul smiled at him with genuine contentment, making Emmett feel warm inside. 

“I don’t think of you like that at all, Emmett.” 

Emmett wanted to hug him and never let go. 

“Listen Paul, I-”

Charlotte ruined the moment.

  
  


Everyone was gone. Charlotte, Bill, Ted. People Emmett didn’t know, but he wasn’t gonna hide the fact that they didn’t deserve that ending. Hidgens had betrayed them in cold blood, which really hit him hard. Emmett felt sick. Physically and emotionally.

His leg happened to be impaled by a piece of debris. 

“SHiiiit. Shittt.”

Paul looked at him with worry and concern and Emmett finally realized he was gonna die. 

He was gonna die without kissing Paul Matthews. 

“Paul, listen. I know why you came into Beanie’s all those times, and it wasn’t because you liked our shit coffee. Our coffee was shit, ‘cause we didn’t care. Sometimes we would spit on it…. So you might’ve drank my spit, but I didn’t know you back then, and I wish I did. If we get through this, I would like to go see a nice — _ silent _ — movie with you. But… in case we don’t. Kiss me?” 

“Okay.”

It should have been perfect, but Emmett had to go and fuck it up, so now Paul didn’t wanna kiss him. He knew it wasn’t right to take offence, that was a perfectly proportional reaction to someone spitting in your face, but it still hurt. As Paul jogged off to defeat the Meteor, Emmett could only sit there, wondering where he went wrong. 

It felt like eons before someone came back for him.

“P-Paul?” He cracked his eyes open to check.

“No, sir. I need you to try and move your hands for me.” A female voice said.

“You’re not singing? Why aren’t you singing?”

“Please don’t say anything right now. It’s for your health for you to use as little energy as possible.”

“Who… who are you?”

“I’m from PEIP, sir. I’m afraid to say that you’re the sole survivor of this catastrophe.”

“Paul?”

“No. Just close your eyes, I’ve got you.”

  
  
  


He was Kevin now. What a shitty name. He shouldn’t have been the one to survive. A high school dropout without a job shouldn’t have been the lone survivor of a massacre that took out his entire hometown. Nevertheless, Colonel Schaffer insisted someone was waiting for him outside. 

_ Paul.  _ He was right there, in front of Emmett, smiling. 

“You made it! We made it!” 

Then he started singing. 

  
  


Emmett Perkins wasn’t special. He wasn’t the ‘chosen one’ or a superhero. Yet, it seemed that the one person he maybe loved was standing in front of him, dead for no apparent reason other than the world had a sick sense of irony. 

He really did lose.

**Author's Note:**

> This was bad, but I'm kinda digging it. If I get enough encouragement, I might write about Emmett and Paul more.  
> Validate me, guys.


End file.
